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TOPHAT GAMER

I play games, chances are so do you. Let's talk about it.
Apr 21 '14
Happy Easter to me!

Happy Easter to me!

4 notes Tags: captain America marvel

Apr 20 '14

4 notes (via thatbellagaze & tophat-gamer)

Apr 20 '14

Goat Simulator

..How do I even review this? Honestly. Let’s take that story section and just cram it for today. This is Goat Simulator. And it’s certainly..something..

Goat Simulator cover.jpg

CONCEPT

Goat Simulator is  parody game, a game who’s sole purpose is to poke fun at the (often buggy) simulator genre, a genre that has quite a following, but not for the reasons that it would prefer. The difference with Goat simulator is that it’s about as far from a realistic Sim game as possible, as you direct your little goat hero across a small town wreaking havoc.

PRESENTATION

Goat Simulator looks like a glorified tech demo for a physics engine. Little to no effort seems to have been put into the graphics or effects, but in it’s defence, the game holds up pretty well when every asset on screen decides to ignore gravity and fly around your view.

The music is largely unremarkable, but the array of goat noises is certainly interesting. Some of the sounds coming from your Goat’s mouth are downright disturbing.

GAMEPLAY

You know that Insurance Fraud mini-game in the Saint’s Row series? Goat Simulator is pretty much that. You direct your goat across a (woefully) small map, causing as much destruction as possible with no time limit, and no real end goal. This game is literally a chaotic sandbox to mess around in.

The game allows you to lick and grab items with your tongue, buck or kick items and run and jump as well. But without an overarching goal, the novelty of it all wears off fast.

REPLAYABILITY

Ok, so there’s not alot to the gameplay, but in it’s defence, Goat Simulator has a small number of Easter Eggs to find, such as the Demon Goat power and the Tall Goat mod, These are mildly entertaining, but at the end of the day, they’re minor modifications on gameplay that get’s stale after 20 minutes.

OVERVIEW

Don’t buy Goat Simulator. Least of all for the amount that they’re asking. It’s funny for about an hour at it’s best, but that’s all the game has going for it. With no incentive to keep playing beyond “It’s funny, LOLZ”, it get’s old fast, and while it has some neat secrets, there’s nowhere near enough to be worth the price of admission.

I think the worst thing is that Goat Simulator’s cult popularity is already inspiring ripoff’s. Meaning time, effort and money are going from games with potential to bullshit like this. It’s almost flappy bird, all over again.

4 notes Tags: Goat Simulator Steam Video Games Gaming Review

Apr 20 '14

OK, bed time..

Apr 20 '14

Dammit Jake… Why’d you have to pick a The Predator?

But seriously, I think this’ll turn out ok.. Maybe.. It’s late. My judgement can’t be trusted..

Apr 20 '14
your face works awesom,e

It’s serves a purpose =P

Apr 20 '14
in that case I should be either Dante or Kamina

Dante works. =P

1 note

Apr 20 '14
Dude, I am bevved up, and I definitely want you to drawify me. Do the thing.
I’ll do the thing, but you need to give me a character =P For instance, Jake (as usual) said Predator. So. Predator Jake. I’m planning on using this in some way for like.. a Youtube banner. Which is perfect coz we’ve done vids together.

2 notes

Apr 20 '14

So I’m trying to do this thing where I draw myself and some friends as game/geeky characters.. No idea if I have the patience..

I’m bad at this.

4 notes

Apr 20 '14

Do you ever follow someone and they follow you and you really wanna be friends with them but you feel like you’re bothering them everytime you try to interact with them but they’re just so cool and you’re just like

image

(Source: sylvehun)

184,092 notes (via keptonice & sylvehun)Tags: I dunno about that cat.. but yes?